Television

There is so much humour around all of us. Most of it is contained in a 14 inch box set on a top of a table in almost all houses. The box has everything in it. It makes people laugh sometimes and it makes them cry sometimes. There are always people who laugh even when the box intends to make them cry but then that is a problem with those people. Let’s not go into the details of those pathethic feelingless morons. Then there are times when the box makes wars that last for a lifetime.Wars for gaining control of the box using a smaller box. Wars between siblings, parent and child, parent and parent, child and child’s leaky friend from the neighbourhood and many more. The smaller box has to go through all sorts of hands : fair, dark, big, small, medium,hairy, very hairy, more hairy, gorilla hairy, holy moly hairy. Whoever commands the smaller box commands the bigger box. Provided the enemy is lazy enough to not get up and walk to the bigger box and control it from there. But then that is a given most of the time. The box is also known to make peace though. Peace between people who want the same thing from the box.

But it isn’t a wonder that there is so much war over the box. The box is priceless. It has a lot to offer. The ding sound that comes when you switch the box on arguably excites a person as much as the lub dub of the heart of a dying patient excites a doctor. When the sound comes, the body falls. Onto the couch into the hole that is shaped like a human. And then the thumb controls the smaller box. The bigger box in the meantime goes from a cat chasing a mouse to an airplane bombing a ship to three people singing and dancing with girls around them to a man telling you news to a woman walking towards you in a weird way to a host asking a man some questions to a woman walking towards you in a weird way to a host asking a man some questions to a woman walking towards you in a weird way. But it looks boring from the box’s point of view. All it sees is the guy scrolling the smaller box and at the same time looking around behind him and then again scrolling.

Then there are serials. When a person discovers something shocking in a serial, he is shown from all angles. His face comes in from the left first, then the right, then the top, then the bottom of the screen. I tried to figure out why they show it to us like that and it seems that they do it to give it a touch of reality, as in to make the viewers feel like this is happening for real. Yeah right! When we see a person shocked in real life, we turn our heads to the right and then to him and then to the left and then again to him and then we look down and then look at him and then we look up and then again at him. And all this at lightning speed. I would say that this would shock the person even more because our heads will just drop at his feet.

And then there are advertisements. Celebrities come in and tell you that they are good-looking because they use so and so cream. In other words, they are saying that you should also use this cream if you are not using it already. In other words, they are saying that if you are not using that cream, you are ugly. And you obviously are not using that cream because you don’t even know about the cream which is why you have been watching the advertisement till now. So finally, all they are saying is that you are ugly! And some creams even guarantee payback if you don’t see a difference in a few days. I wonder what that means. Does it mean that you are so ugly that even the cream can’t help you?

And then there are movies. I don’t even know where to start.

So I won’t start on them. Bye. Take care.

P.S: No offence to anything or anyone. I am rather expecting incentive from everyone mentioned for publicity. Except the leaky boy in the neighbourhood of course. He can have it for free. Just stay away.